How To Have A Great Relationship With Your Nanny
Written By: Bosky Singh, Moms on Maternity Columnist.
Nannies have become part and parcel of today’s lifestyle. Nannies are like family now and like any other member of the family, we need to have a great relationship with them and maybe even more-so as they are looking after our kids who are the apples of our eyes.
And it’s a bit tricky as well cause of both the professional and personal dynamics involved. I believe in treating the nanny as a family member and yet as an employee. But many of us find ourselves out of our depths when it comes to the biggest question - HOW?
WELCOME YOUR NANNY INTO THE FAMILY:
Who doesn’t want to feel welcomed? Let them know right from the beginning that they are supposed to feel like a part of your clan and treat them as such.
SHARE CLEAR EXPECTATIONS:
Let your nanny know what your expectations are of them right from the start to avoid any complications in the future. Let them know about the chores they have to do and please don’t start making unnecessary new demands once they start. Always be clear that baby/ kids are always the priority and that the rest can wait.
LET YOUR NANNY BE INCHARGE:
I find this one the hardest for moms, letting someone else be in charge of their kids. Many times, it happens that we come home early from work or when we have a day off or are maybe working from home (which has become more the norm) we need to learn to let the nanny be in charge.
This may mean having to over-ride your go to mothering instinct a tad, but we need to understand that’s what your nanny is there for. Don’t micromanage your nanny or undermine her judgment. If she has reprimanded the kids for their behavior or something similar to that respect her decision. The kids need to know that you both are a member of the same team and they can’t use one against the other.
SPLURGE ON YOUR NANNY:
Yeah! That’s right! Splurge on your nanny. We all want to be spoiled from time to time, so why should our nanny be any different? Treat her to a spa or something nice once in a while, perhaps an occasional lunch break away from kids especially when she is going through difficult times or we see the kids going through one of the phases. Do wish her on her birthday and give a small gift as this goes a long way in showing her that you care. And these little gestures would make her feel appreciated and that the work she does matter.
COMMUNICATION (LISTEN):
Always take out time to communicate with your nanny. And mothers listen as much as you talk. I believe communication is the secret ingredient in having a great relationship. How can you know what’s going on if you don’t communicate? When you give your ear to someone you are showing that person that you care and the person’s opinions matter. Be open-minded, see things from her point of view and work together to find solutions to problems, if any. Good communication is the foundation stone to any great relationship.
Someone very rightly said: The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.
DON’T BE FINANCIALLY STINGY (BE GENEROUS):
Be financially generous whenever you can. Give her bonuses and other such benefits on your own account. Don’t register her every minute don’t be stingy on money. If someday she has to leave a half an hour early let her go without deducting her salary. At times give her a paid day off. When you do such things without her asking, you are in a way investing in them doing even better. They’ll be working harder and be more appreciative of you and more cheerful. And we all want happy people in and around our house and kids. Right?
INVITE THEM TO FAMILY EVENTS:
Make it a point to invite them to some but not all family events particularly those related to the kids like your kid’s play rehearsal or bday party. If you are inviting them make sure you let them know they are not expected to work at that time and to just come and have a good time.
ENJOY THE PROCESS & HAVE FUN:
Ladies, you have put in the work to find the perfect nanny for you. Now, why don’t you lay back and enjoy the process and let your nanny be in charge? It's time to enjoy the fruits of your labor. Stop fretting about things, learn to let things go and have fun cause besides all the responsibilities and stuff that comes with mothering, now is the time to have fun and make lifelong memories.
WRITTEN BY:
Bosky Singh is Mom to one boy aged 4. She is a regular columnist for Moms on Maternity.